June 26, 2020
It's most painful when it hurts you –
but you just can't let it go!
They say time heals all wounds,
but will time heal you when you're the sore you want to blot out?
What can the therapist give but consoling words - reminding you of this same everything you do not want to ever remember!
Of how it was here and how it's now gone!
Your love, your life, your dreams!
Of how you are here and how you still are!
How is she to comfort you when you wish you were gone too!
Sometimes it takes more than just words to heal,
sometimes it takes deepening oneself into the dark, covering up your whole body in a water full of ice
like locking up yourself in the same room he died and crying your eyes out till the source runs dry,
Sometimes it takes the blade running its loving kindness on your skin to remind you that you're not gone, at least not yet.
Since you still can feel pain, you’re still here.
Sometimes it takes shouting at yourself – screaming out lung!
Sometimes it’s just in being silent, listening to the winds whispering!
Telling you everything everyone said without you even listening!
Sometimes it takes just accepting –that you are in pain and that you are the only beautiful thing that can take you out of it.